My new 'assignment'

"Have only a few private devotions, but be constant in them."
   ~St Josemaria Escriva - The Way # 552




I tend to be an "all or nothing" kind of person, at least when it comes to me and how I do things. On top of that I am most definitely a perfectionist. Lately these characteristics have been manifesting themselves in my spiritual life -  specifically in terms of spiritual devotions. I know I need to put God first - to make sure I set aside time for Him, with Him and learning about Him. But how to do this has been my question.
There are so many wonderful devotions - ways to aid one in their walk with God, in their relationship with the Creator. How to choose?
My decision was? Try to do them all! Well, not really all but a lot. My plan was to make sure to do the following everyday: Morning offering, Devotional time, Scripture time, Time to pray for my family, Rosary, Angelus, Divine Mercy Chaplet, Prayer time with husband, Helping Abby with her devotions, Mass Readings, Saint of the Day and perhaps daily Mass. Needless to say I was feeling overwhelmed! Not to mention guilty and bad about myself since I couldn't make it happen.

I needed help.. I needed direction. So, I went to speak with a priest (Michael and I found a spiritual director - more on this later).

This is what he told me (in part and paraphrased):

It's normal to have limited time to spend in prayer when you have two small children. Don't worry, as the kids grow you will have more time. For now, take the 2 or 5 or 10 minutes you have during the day and use that time to focus intensely on Him.

Be Spirit led in all you do. He will direct your days and your ways. Focus on the intention of each action – it's about heart attitude. Give all you can even if it's a small amount. Just like the poor woman who gave her last few coins and woman who gave her last bit of flour and oil to make bread for Elijah, give your all to God even if that 'all' seems small and insignificant.

Focus on the Sacraments and not as much on the sacramentals. Give priority to the Sacraments in your life and only if you have time add specific devotions.


So, what does this mean for me and my daily spiritual journey?

1. I must go to Mass on Sunday and try to worthily receive my Lord in the Eucharist.
2. I must not neglect my relationship with my husband - this means taking care of his needs and spending time with him.
3. I "must make it (my) constant care to bring (my children) up in the practice of the faith" just as I promised to do at my marriage and their baptism. This includes taking care of them physically and emotionally as well.
4. Anytime I have a few quite minutes I need to spend them focused on my God - talking to Him, thinking about Him.

This is my 'assignment.' Let's see if I can handle it...

Ad majorem Dei gloriam

Was I productive?

So often, as a stay-at-home mom, I find that I internally – and most of the time, subconsciously – chide myself for not being productive enough. I'm not completely sure what definition of 'productive' I'm holding up as my standard. That will have to be looked at another time. Today I've decided just to put down 'on paper' what I've accomplished this sun-up to sun-down.


Made 3 meals and at least 3 snacks - thus feeding myself, my husband, my 3 year old and my baby

Cleaned hands and faces, spills and messes resulting from this food consumption

Emptied and Filled the dishwasher. Emptied it again, halfway at least

Did 1 load of laundry and washed cloth diapers

Did 'school' with Abby – worksheets and coloring

Had my sister and my 2 year old niece down for a visit this morning; during this time we played a game, did watercolor painting, read stories and had a snack

Put two kids down for a nap, albeit at two different times

Made two important phone calls

Wrote three thankyou notes

Swept the kitchen

Changed 8 sets of clothing: 3 each for the children and 2 for me

Cleaned up 2 potty training accidents and changed numerous dirty diapers

Cleaned out the clogged drain in the tub – very gross!

Took a shower:-)

Picked up at least 100 books - one of Zack's fav things to do is pull all the books from the shelf. Takes him about 30secs to do the damage and me about 10 mins to remedy it. Not efficient;-)

General household pick-up and organizing

Cuddled, kissed and loved my two children

Managed not to lose my patience too much

Encouraged and loved my husband

Prayed – for my family, my friends and myself

Talked to God


When I look at all that – the big tasks and the small, the easy and the difficult, the enjoyable and the not so enjoyable – I realize that productive IS something that I can attribute to myself. Today and everyday that I give of myself to those I love.

And now I will close my eyes and try to sleep, for tomorrow will be yet another productive day!

Ad majorem Dei gloriam

With Love's Help

“I could travel over oceans, cross the deserts, climb the mountains
Just to share your story, bring you glory, and win souls for you.
I could sing like an angel, songs so humble and so thankful
Full of drama and emotion, so the world would know your truth.
I could give away my money and my clothes and my food
To restore those people who are poor, lost, and down-and-out.
Oh, I could succeed at all these things,
Find favor with peasants and kings,
But if I do not love, I am nothing.”
~from I Am Nothing by Ginny Owens (musician)

“Most of our life is unimportant, filled with trivial things from morning to night. But when it is transformed by love it is of interest even to the angels.”
~from The Long Loneliness by Dorothy Day (author)

The first quote captures the great desire I have to do great things for God. Sometimes this desire is so immense that I feel as if I would burst. It is almost painful, this longing.

The second quote describes the insignificance I often feel when carrying out my daily duties of wife and mother – homemaker and care-giver. This feeling is painful in a different way. Trapped and plodding, a weariness.

BUT...

It is love that serves as a balm to soothe the pain, the ache. It is love that tempers and purifies my aspirations for greatness. It should be God's greatness and my humilty that I should always seek. Love allows me to do this. It is love that transforms my daily, often monotonous actions into something greater. Something beautiful.

And so, I will:

“Persevere in the exact fulfilment of the obligations of the moment. That work — humble, monotonous, small — is prayer expressed in action that prepares you to receive the grace of the other work — great and wide and deep — of which you dream.”
~ from The Way by Saint Jose-Maria Escriva

With Love's help, I can and will do this and so much more.

"I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."
~Phillipians 4:13

The need to pray

Feeling overwhelmed....



How am I to raise up my children to be saints? How can I when I feel so far from becoming one myself?



I can do nothing. God can to all things!



I need to pray more and often. Everyday. Placing them in the care of Our Lord and Our Lady and St Joseph

Successful Mother

What makes one a successful mother? A clean house? Complete Organization? Infinite Patience with one's children? Perfection?

No, one is a successful mother if she: does her best, loves her children (and shows them that she does), is willing to admit when she is wrong and apologize to her children, prays for help and forgiveness from her Heavenly Father and teaches her children - not only about God - but how to love Him with all their hearts.

Do I do all these things all the time? No. But I'm trying and God is faithful.

He has blessed me with and through my children and is teaching me how to love Him more even as I teach my children how to do the same.

Tonight my 2 year old daughter picked up a rosary and started praying for Mommy, Daddy, Abigail, Zack, Auntie Rae, Daniel, Angelina....she prayed to Jesus, she prayed for Him to "make us all feel better", she prayed for a "miracle" and she did all this without prompting.

What a blessing! What more can I ask for? It is in this simple action that I know I am a "success".

Praise Father, Son and Holy Ghost! Amen

Mother of Two

I'm a mother of two. Two beautiful children. Little gifts from God. Gifts, yes. But also crosses. A way to help me "work out [my] salvation with fear and trembling." (Phil 2:12) How difficult, how wonderful - being a parent, a mother. Mother, mama. It means so much, requires so much. Blessed Mary - Theotokos - Mother of God, pray for me. Interceed for me before the throne of your Son, so that I might live out my vocation of motherhood well. That I might one day see the face of God and bring up my children such that they will be able to do the same. Amen. Amen.